by Jane Morris
Jane Morris is the pseudonym for a South London based counsellor. This is part of of Jane’s regular series on Dulwich OnView with tips and thoughts on well-being to inspire you.
‘Remember to have the humility and grace to appreciate my current position and condition’…..
I don’t remember where I read this, but I have it written on a post-it note in my kitchen, it’s been there for years.
It sounds like a simple enough idea and yet how many of us spend most of our waking hours thinking about the next meeting, journey, film etc..anything instead of what we’re doing, or indeed feeling, experiencing, now.
I remember years ago while in Nepal, queuing in a line of young travellers getting some food supplies for the day, and was struck by the conversations buzzing all around me. What I noticed was how none of them appeared to be aware of the intense beauty of the place we were in right there and then, no talk of the mountains, prayer flags, wonderful food, smells, what they were chattering about was how high they went, how many places they’d ‘done’ – like they had a checklist and once they’d ‘done’ it could move onto the next. I remember wondering then if they were even noticing anything, they could have been anywhere.
I often think that just noticing how you don’t have an illness, how well you’re feeling, can be such a treat! rather than waiting until you’re ill and really noticing how you’re feeling then. It seems that often we only notice how we’re doing when something’s wrong. It’s almost as if pleasure and happiness are taken for granted.
If we choose to actively think in terms of feeling fortunate if something positive happens and really notice the effects of it, rather than just moaning about the negative, an altogether different emphasis could exist in our lives.
To consciously engage with the experience can feel really special.
When I’ve caught myself noticing the pleasure I’m feeling just being in conversation with another human being, somehow the experience goes much deeper, to sense the momentary connectedness between us – as well as what we’re talking about, makes it feel very different.
As Sophocles once said: ‘Look and you will find it – what is unsought will go undetected’
Rather than working or living in the now, we spin our wheels and indulge in daydreams of what could have, would have, should have. Pay attention to what’s around you now, paying attention is a way to connect and survive.
Photo: thanks to tojosan from flickr.com (CCL)
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